


Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way

by ThePlace



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Declarations Of Love, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Secret Relationship, Surprise Party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2017-07-04
Packaged: 2018-11-20 22:17:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11344200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThePlace/pseuds/ThePlace
Summary: Had Taako known that there was a surprise party waiting for him up on the moon when he had invited Kravitz back to his dorm after their date, their night would have turned out far differently.





	1. Laughter

**Author's Note:**

> Here we go! First time writing for taz so I'm rather excited to see how this goes! Just a heads up, the first two chapters will be centered around Taako's perspective while the last two chapters are more from Kravitz's perspective. Additionally, there are other characters in the story besides Taako and Kravitz, but seeing as the others show up for basically a chapter and a half, I didn't want to tag them as main characters or anything. Finally, this is set before The Suffering Game and does contain references to the other arcs before then. Hope you all enjoy!

The docks of Neverwinter were never truly quiet. Carried along by a warm breeze, the sounds of horse’s hooves clomping against cobblestone streets, vendors calling out their wares in booming voices, the distant croning of sailors singing sea shanties as they ventured back and forth from the far reaching waves and a million other sounds all weaved together to form the melody of Neverwinter.

Taako didn’t give a shit about any of it.

As he strolled along the streets, the only sound that had fully captured his full attention was a booming laugh filled with snorts and wheezes and a few tears here and there. Next to him, Kravitz was trying to compose himself, but in all honesty, was failing miserably. As he laughed, he would straighten his back, cover his mouth and hold out his other hand with his index finger raised as if trying to motion that he just needed a minute or maybe he was trying to make a point, Taako really couldn’t tell. Almost immediately after gaining a shred of ground on the road to not dying in the street, Kravitz would go back to laughing. To make matters worse, every now and again, he would loose his composure so much that his face would start to turn gaunt and then just fully transform into a skeleton, red eyes and all.

Now Taako had certainly seen Kravitz laugh before. He remembered the way his heart stupidly fluttered with every chuckle that passed Kravitz’s lips during their first date. However, those laughs had been neat and tidy, not insincere Taako hoped, but certainly contained. This laugh was the exact opposite and if his heart had been merely fluttering before at those light chuckles, it had basically cast levitate on itself and was trying to burst out of his chest at this laugh. The fact that Taako had been the one to cause this laughter made it all the better.

“You doing alright there, my man?” Taako asked as Kravitz’s laughter began to calm down. “Taako can’t have his hot date keeling over in the streets or anything. I mean, if you even can die.” Suddenly his train of thought when zooming off course as if it had suddenly been transported from its railroad tracks to, as a completely random example, a beautiful greenhouse filled with a murderer’s begonias. “Would you pop back over to your scary ghost pond if you died? Or would you, I don’t know, just have to fill out paperwork cause if that's the case, can you leave out the part where me getting us kicked out of Fantasy Olive Garden partly caused all this? No disrespect to the Raven Queen or whatevs, but I don’t want her showing up and-”

In the middle of his ramblings, Taako felt a cold hand intertwine with his own. “I’m not dying,” Kravitz said with a reassuring smile, the faint traces of laughter still present on his lips. “And no, the Raven Queen won’t be making a house call, I assure you. I am terribly sorry about all that though; I certainly didn’t want to make our presence known to everyone in the city or anything. I know my laugh is not exactly the most,” he paused and it was then that Taako noticed the way his other hand was rubbing the back of his neck, how his ears were beginning to flush and the sheepish grin creeping up on his face, “elegant.”

Taako stopped. A part of him almost wanted to be offended. As if he, Taako Taaco, would not find Kravitz’s laugh the best thing on this entire rock heap. This was a laugh that Johann would be lucky to write a song about and even if he did, Taako would backflip off the fucking moon before he let some fish swimming in its own jizz eat that song cause there was no way he would let anyone forget this laugh.

He didn’t say any of that though. No siree. Not happening. Nope.  _ Way  _ to vulnerable for Taako’s liking. Saying mushy shit like that was just asking for something bad to happen. For all he knew, as soon as he opened his mouth to tell Kravitz how much he loved his laugh, some God or other would decide Taako had been getting a bit too happy and  _ bam _ , Kravitz disintegrates, only leaving a pile of extremely well tailored clothes and a some raven feathers.

Without his permission, his brain quickly supplied him with a far more likely scenario; a scenario that Taako feared could be right around any corner. He would say something sappy, maybe something about how he loved Kravitz’s laugh or maybe that he loved spending time with him or how he loved . . . Kravitz. And then  _ bam _ , Kravitz would decide that Taako was getting too clingy for his liking and just leave, just pop right into his ghost pond and never look back.

“-ako? Taako? Taako are you alright?” Kravitz was asking him, concern etched into every perfect feature on his face. “You zoned out there for a second.”

Taako blinked and then smiled at Kravitz. “Yo, chillax, Taako’s all good.” As he gently squeezed Kravitz’s hand, he quickly slam dunked any lingering thoughts of disintegration or abandonment into his fucking mental garbage can where they belonged and would stay until he decided that he had finally had enough of this world, because Taako’s not dying baby, he’s going out in style.

With just a look, Taako could tell that Kravitz was tense. Hindsight’s 20/20, maybe going suddenly silent right after his date basically said he hated his own laugh wasn’t gonna make it into Taako’s Great Big Book of Great Ideas or anything. “But as I was saying, who gives a shit about elegance?” Clicking his tongue twice, Taako pointed his fingers at his own face. “Not this guy that’s for sure.”

Kravitz looked like he was about to say something, but Taako pushed on. He needed to keep a sense of humor to the situation because if he started getting sentimental, Taako didn’t know what would happen.

“I mean, I’m killing my away across the world with two dudes who, while trying to stop a bank robbery, tried to  _ start _ another bank robbery.” Kravitz made a face and Taako reminded himself to tell him that story later. “They are the complete opposite of elegant. Hell, one time Magnus nearly got thrown off a train by a professional wrestler and Merle once seduced an actual goddamn plant right in front of me and trust me, I wish everyday that I was kidding on that one.” He paused and shuddered at the memory. Maybe he wouldn’t tell Kravitz that part of the story. “So, if you’re not elegant, which take it from me you are the most elegant person I’ve ever met, that just means you’ll fit right in, bonedog.”

Kravitz doesn’t say anything and Taako spends a few agonizing seconds wondering if he just fucked something up. Was he too aloof? Would Kravitz think he was making fun of him? Taako was almost afraid to look at Kravitz. Almost. He had stared down those who had grabbed at godhood. He could look at his own date.

When he did turn to Kravitz, Taako was glad he did. On his face he wore a goofy grin that Taako instantly went starry eyed over. “A professional wrestler, really?”

“A professional wrestler named Jess the Beheader!” Taako said with delight and began to recount the tale. As he told the story, Kravitz’s arm wrapped itself around Taako’s waist and Taako did the same inturn. Besides the sweet smell of Kravitz, Taako noticed one other thing: whenever Kravitz laughed, it was far less constrained than before and with every snort and wheeze, Taako could feel himself fall deeper and deeper in love.

He wouldn’t tell Kravitz that, no, not then. He was too busy listening to him laugh.


	2. Surprise

As the sun began to hug the horizon and spray the docks with pink and red and yellow, a clocktower in the distance started to toll. For a split second, Taako seemed to be confused by the bell as if was lying to him. He and Kravitz had been aimlessly wandering the docks for what felt like fifteen minutes tops, but if the bell was to be believed, it had been over an hour since they had been asked to leave the Fantasy Olive Garden.

“Eight already, huh?” Kravitz said with his eyebrows raised. “Where has the time gone?”

“Oh shit is it really eight?” Taako tried to recount how many strikes of the bell he heard. “Sweet!”

Kravitz paused. “Is something the matter?”

Taako smiled and twirled his umbra staff. “The exact opposite. Merle’s bible study has just started!”

What greeted him next was a blank expression. “I’m . . . I’m not sure I follow. What does Merle’s bible study have to do with anything?” Kravitz slowly asked.

“Look, long story short, Merle’s basically the only cloth man the moon’s got. He hosts these sessions where he . . .” Taako trailed off and thought for a moment. “Well, I don’t really know. He does something, blesses babies, reads things. I’ve never sat through one. That whole scene ain’t really my thang. He tried to get me to go to one and woo-wee that did not end well. Anywho, to be closer to Pan or something, he goes outside and leaves our dorm completely empty until nine.”

Kravitz looked like he had several questions, but after a few seconds he settled on one. “What about Magnus?”

“Oh don’t worry about him,” Taako reassured. “He trains with Carey while Merle does his thing. He’ll drag himself back in after getting his ass handed to him around ten.”

Silently, Taako hoped that Kravitz would pick up on the big picture he was shooting his way. Empty dorm. No chance of roommates walking in at the wrong moment. If he was lucky, Kravitz would suggest they retire back to the moon and then they would see where the evening went. If he was unlucky . . .

“Well, I can drop you off at your dorm now, if you want?” Kravitz asked lightly. “It is getting rather late.”

Okay, so it looked like if he wanted the evening to continue, Taako was going to have to push it along his own damn self. “Cool cool cool, loving that idea. Trying to get a ride back to the moon? Not the best, ya know?” He took a breath. “Or . . .”

Turning so that he fully faced Taako, Kravitz looked at him expectantly and, dare he think, hopefully. “Or . . .” Kravitz repeated.

Fuck it, Taako was going to barrel right through this. What’s up everyone, time for Taako’s speedrun of asking his date to join him in his quarters. “Or you could come chillax on the moon with everyone’s favorite elf? Maybe drink some wine, chat, all that good stuff. And then when Merle and Magnus get back, we could just mosey on into my room so we don’t have to deal with  _ that _ can of worms tonight.” He paused and then quickly added, “if you want to. Of course.”

“Taako,” Kravitz said and in the second pause between that word and the next, Taako went through the five stages of grief, invented two more and also died, “that sounds absolutely lovely.”

Wordlessly, Kravitz’s scythe appeared in his hand as if it had never left. With a swift movement, Kravitz split the setting colors of the sun and extended out his other hand in the same way someone would hold a door open. “After you.”

Although Taako knew that this must be a very mundane thing for a Reaper, he couldn’t help but find some romance in the thought that Kravitz was tearing open the sky just for him. “Don’t mind if I do.” Stepping through the portal, Taako suddenly found himself miles above the world and standing in his darkened kitchen.

His ears twitched.

Rustling fabric.

Hushed breaths.

Whispers in the dark.

_ Something _ was wrong.

There were people in his dorm, hiding in the gloom. Even with his darkvision, Taako could only see a few figures huddled around the room, but he knew there were more. He only had a few seconds to decide what to do. From the sounds bouncing around, there were quite a few people, maybe even too many for he and Kravitz to take on alone, no matter how amazing they both were.

Luckily, Taako was fairly positive that the intruders had not noticed him yet. The ones he could see were all faced toward the elevator door. Waiting. Damn, he wouldn’t even be able to tell the others what the faces of the people who were definitely geared up to murder him looked like. Welp, time to fucking vamoose. Despite the fact that his date was basically Death himself, actually dying really didn’t factor into Taako’s plans for the night. So, as quickly and quietly as could, he began to back up toward the rift.

Kravitz chose that moment to walk out of the rift.

As the two of them toppled to the ground, Taako could hear two things: The sound of Kravitz yelping as he fell ontop of him, and oddly, something popping.

Suddenly, the lights around the room came on and all illusions that he and Kravitz could easily get out of there vanished like the darkness. It was then, lying on the floor, that Taako realised he could see streamers hanging from the ceiling.

Odd.

“Who fell? Are you hurt?” A voice called out.

A voice that sounded exactly like Magnus.

Takko quickly hauled himself into a sitting position just in time for Magnus to peer over the countertops.

“Taako?” He asked, one half surprised, one half confused. “What are you doing-”, suddenly he stopped when his eyes landed on the only other person sprawled out on the kitchen floor. “Kravitz?” He said, this time one half confused, the other defensive. “If you’re here for Noelle you can fuck right off cause we won that cardgame fair and square and we definitely didn’t cheat, that’s for sure!”

Well . . . Fuck. If dying himself wasn’t apart of Taako’s date night plans, having Kravitz get a phantom fist to the face definitely wasn’t either. “Whoa, hold on there big fella!” Quickly, Taako scrambled up from the floor and stood between the two men. “He’s with me! He’s not collecting anyone’s souls and-” Taako would have said more to convince Magnus not to kill Kravitz, but he got a little distracted by the sight of his friends and coworkers all standing around awkwardly in his living room. “The fuck?”

Near the couch, Merle gave a little wave. “Surprise,” he said awkwardly. “Happy birthday.”

Next to him, Kravitz stood up.

A lot of people began to speak at once.

“Taako, who is this man?”

“Isn’t that the guy from the Chug and Squeeze?”

“How did he get in here without coming down the elevator?”

“Come to take the other arm, huh?”

“Davenport!”

“I warned them you wouldn’t like a surprise party, sir!”

“Quick! Start playing something!”

“It’s your birthday?”

Ohhh boyyy. Ohh boyy. Oh boy. Oh boy. Oh boy. Would his own umbrella eat him? Could he just pry that bad boy open, pop his head in and then wait for it to just swallow him whole? Cause on the list of “Things Taako Could Handle At That Moment”, there was just no room for a surprise party and there was certainly no room for “Telling his friends and coworkers that he was dating Death”. Nope. Not happening. Could not pencil that shit in if he tried.

Except as he quickly glanced around at the expectant faces watching him, the realization that there was no way to get out of the situation dawned on him. Okay then, if he was going to this, Taako was going to do it Taako’s way.

“What’s everyone standing around for?” Taako asked as he grabbed a glass of  . . . Of something. Something hopefully full of alcohol on the counter. “This is a party, ain’t it? Johann, crank those tunes, my man!”

Hesitantly, Johann brought his bow up to his violin and the room began to fill with music.

As Kravitz stood next to him, shuffling his feet and refusing to make eye contact with Merle who was staring at him without blinking, Taako grabbed his hand. “Oh yeah everyone, this is Kravitz, my hot date. He’s Death and also stronger than all of you, so don’t try any shit, m’kay?”

By some miracle, that actually worked and the room settled into a semblance of normalcy. Carey and Killian seemed the least surprised by the turn of events and had settled onto the couches with Noelle while trying to call Magnus over. Magnus, for his part, was  _ attempting _ to act casual as he blocked Noelle from Kravitz’s view as if at any moment, Kravitz was going to take a running leap for her soul. The Director, oddly enough, didn’t seem that interested in Kravitz, but was paying particular attention to Taako. As she chatted with other party guests, she would occasionally glance over to him with a look of  . . . concern? Pity? Taako couldn’t tell and didn’t really want to find out either. Merle was over by Johann tearing up the dance floor. There were only two problems with that though. One: Merle was the only one dancing. Two: As he danced, Merle kept constant eye contact with Kravitz in what Taako assumed was either establishing dominance or an invitation for a dance off to the death. Others hovered nearby the kitchen, obviously wanting to give their gifts or talk to The Birthday Boy but seemed to be waiting for Kravitz to leave his side.

On one hand, Taako was touched that all of his friends and coworkers would throw a party just for him. On the other, why, just why, couldn’t his birthday have been some other day?

With a swift motion, Taako threw back the drink he had picked up. Key Lime Gogurt. Of course.

“So . . .” Kravitz started. “It’s your birthday? I had no idea.”

Taako chuckled but even to him it felt a bit hollow. “You and me both, buddy. Not exactly a day I count down to or anything. ” It wasn’t a lie. Even though the idea of everyone coming together to give him gifts and eat cake really should have been great for Taako, it had never appealed. There were hazy childhood memories of sitting in the back of some shitty caravan with an even shittier cake he had made, singing Happy Birthday to himself. Alone. If he dwelled on those memories for too long, his brain would shuffle him along to something else as if to say ‘nothing to see here, keep moving’. They weren’t the happiest memories though, so Taako never really put up a fight to remember them.

Then once on his birthday when he was doing Sizzle It Up With Taako, he had done a show where he demonstrated how to bake a baller birthday cake. As he had passed around the cake to the audience though, everything had just felt  _ off _ . Like there was something missing, but he could never figure out what. Taako stopped trying to celebrate his birthday after that.

Returning from his shitty trip down memory lane, Taako realised that Kravitz was still standing there, looking so unsure of himself. Perfect. Just perfect. Was Istus up there somewhere knitting into her scarf that he and Kravitz could never just have a normal date? Cause there was no fucking way these things were happening by chance. Well, whether it be by accident or a Goddess with a pair of knitting needles, Taako wasn’t going to make Kravitz stay through this. “Look, Krav. Ya know you don’t have to stick around for this shindig, right? Can’t imagine all this,” he made a vague gesture to the room, “with Merle and Magnus plotting your death over by the punch bowl, is your idea of a good time. Or maybe it is. You do you.”

“If you would rather I leave, I will.” Kravitz said after a moment as he fidgeted with the cuff of his suit. “However, if it’s alright with you, I’d rather stay.”

Taking a few seconds to fully process what he said, Taako knew he probably looked like a gaping fish. “Let me get this straight, which is the probably the first time I’ve done anything straight in my life, you actually want to stay? For this party? The party where the only other people you know, besides my wonderful self, are people who have tried to kill you and you have tried kill in return? I’m getting all that right?”

“Look, Taako, I . . .” He took a deep breath. “I care about you and I know you care about them. And well, I want to get to know them, start mending bridges where I can. They’re your coworkers, your friends, your family and I don’t want to be the cause of any friction between you all. So, yes, I would like to stay.”

There was a lot to unpack there. One, Kravitz cared for him. Two, Kravitz wanted to stay to make him happy. Three, although Taako had privately thought to himself on more than one occasion that Merle and Magnus were his family, having it said out loud was weird but also really nice. And four, the way Kravitz talked about mending bridges and all that jazz definitely seemed like he was thinking about the long term for their relationship, not, ‘I’m getting bored and you’re clingy so hasta la vista forever’.

Sweet.

It suddenly occurred to him that he was just staring silently at Kravitz for who knew how long and that he had better say something before Kravitz just up and left. “Um cool.” He quickly said. “Yeah, if you want to stay, like, be my guest and yeah, if anybody tries to murder you, just uh, give me the signal.”

Kravitz smiled. “The signal?”

“Yep. Came up with it all myself. Just say ‘Taako they’re trying to murder me’ if you get into a pinch and chaboy will heroically come to your rescue.”

Laughing as if it was a joke, which it really wasn’t, Kravitz began to back out of the kitchen. “I’ll keep that in mind as I mingle,” he said and then with a small wave and a smile, he ventured forth into the crowd.

Taako wouldn’t call himself paranoid. Others might, but he thought of himself more as someone who erred on the side of caution. Magnus might have been okay with rushing into shit like weird ass elevators in weird ass crystal labs, but not Taako.

This caution was the reason that, while looking out at his own birthday party, Taako was fairly certain that something was going to go wrong. Maybe it was going to be something small, like someone falling face first into the cake. Maybe it was going to be something bigger, like Magic Brian’s fiance bursting  _ out _ of the cake, vengeance on their mind and swords in their hands. Or maybe, just maybe, it was going to be something horrible and Sazed was going to somehow float up to the BoB headquarters to ruin everything like the world’s shittiest and most murdery balloon.

Also there was a distinct possibility that someone was going to try to drop kick Kravitz off the moon.

Okay then, party time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone enjoyed chapter two! I also hope everyone who listened to episode 66 today wasn't crying as much as I was cause oh boy, there were a lot of tears.


	3. Questions

When Kravitz had met Taako in Neverwinter for their date, he certainly had not imagined that he would end up at a surprise party before the night was over. To be fair though, there were a lot of things in Kravitz’s life that he never could have imagined doing, so it wouldn’t be quite fair to say that going to a surprise party on a fake moon was on the same level of shocking as dying and becoming a bounty hunter for a goddess. 

However, he still felt far more comfortable tracking down wayward souls than trying to make small talk with people who either wanted him dead or thought he wanted them dead, so Kravitz decided to start easy at the party.

“So yeah, I can totally show you my compositions some time,” Johann offered. “It will have to be before the Voidfish eats them, so that does put a bit of a time constraint on that.”

Kravitz smiled and gave the violin he had been examining back to Johann. “Thank you. That sounds lovely.” He honestly could have continued talking to the bard about composing and the different instruments they played, but their conversation was abruptly cut short.

“Kravitz!” A voice next to him suddenly boomed as he felt a hand on his shoulder. Turning, he came face to face with a fairly familiar orc. Kravitz was suddenly very grateful that Taako had pointed her and her girlfriend Carey out in the Chug and Squeeze or else he would have been scrambling to remember if he had heard her name during the crystal lab debacle. “Mind if I steal him for a bit, Johann?” Killian asked as she was already leading Kravitz away.

“Sure, why not.” Johann brought his violin back up under his chin. “Talk to you later Kravitz.”

No question was asked about whether Kravitz himself wanted to be ‘stolen’ and he could only assume he didn’t have much of a choice in the matter.

Maneuvered through the crowd, Kravitz soon found himself sitting on a couch surrounded by people that he had been planning to work himself up to. His strategy had been simple, start with the people who he had not previously tried to murder and slowly make his way towards those like Merle and Magnus. Apparently, Killian had decided that no, that was not how the night was going to go down, and threw him in the proverbial deep end.

There were five other people sitting around on the couches. Carey and Killian were sat next to him with a human he did not recognise. Finally, across of Kravitz on another couch were Merle and Magnus.

Okay, he could do this.

“Kravitz, this is Avi,” Killian pointed to the human next to her. “He works here at the bureau with us and well, you’ve already met everyone else.”

“Lovely to see you all,” Kravitz said and took a sip of his wine to give himself time to think of something else to say. There really wasn’t any good way to phrase ‘sorry I pretended to be your god and got your arm amputated, anyways, what a party?’. Finally, he settled on a safe greeting. “Merle, Magnus, how have you been?”

Taking a leisurely sip of his drink, Merle looked right at him. In that moment, Kravitz knew deep in his unbeating heart, he had somehow managed to fuck up a six word sentence. “Hmm, interesting,” Merle mused. “Coulda sworn it was Merle  _ Fucking  _ Highchurch the last time we met. Not just Merle.”

Oh. Oh right. Kravitz vaguely remembered calling him that. In all fairness though, after dying fifty-seven times, Merle should have counted himself lucky that Merle Fucking Highchurch was the worst thing he had called him.

“Oh yeah, you definitely said that dude,” Magnus chimed in. “You also definitely said it in an accent. What happened to that?”

Kravitz swirled his drink around in its glass. “That was uh, that was my work accent.”

To their credit, Merle and Magnus let the sentence settle in the air for a good five seconds before they absolutely lost it.

“Okay then,” Carey continued on through the laughter and the vague wheezes which Kravitz could barely make out as simply the words, ‘work accent’. “So tell us about yourself Kravitz. We know we had a . . . a rough start, but we all want to get to know you.”

Merle’s laughter finally died down and he let out possibly the fakest cough Kravitz had ever heard in both his life and death and then said, extremely clearly, “I don’t,” and then finished it off with another fake cough.

Magnus high fived him for that one.

Pretending like that hadn’t just happened, Killian urged him on. “Tell us about your job, Kravitz?”

“You work for that uh, crow lady thing, right?” Magnus asked and Kravitz was extremely glad he hadn’t been drinking anything in that moment, because he probably would have choked. That crow lady thing? That crow lady thing! Had he really just referred to the deity that Kravitz had pledged his undying soul to, the goddess of death, the one who sheltered the dead when the living forgot, as  _ that crow lady thing _ ?

Taking a deep breath that he didn’t actually need, Kravitz put on a pained smile. “The Raven Queen. I think you mean the Raven Queen. Yes. I am a bounty hunter for the Raven Queen, not . . . That crow lady thing.”

Magnus laughed, big and booming. “Nah, I’m just messing with you dude. I know her name.”

Oh good. Magnus had messed up the name of the Goddess who oversaw the end to all and sought to cast off from their pedestals those who aspired to be something greater than death itself . . . for a goof. Cool.

“So, um, how did you become a bounty hunter for the Raven Queen?” Avi asked and although Kravitz was grateful that the conversation was moving along, he desperately wished that he had asked a different question.

What was he supposed to say? That he died? That would really lighten the mood of the party.  _ Everyone gather round as I recount the day I died and came into the service of The Raven Queen. _ He may not have been to a party in a while, but Kravitz was quite sure that talking about dying went against some unspoken rules.

He could still remember it. The worst day of his life, and the last. Cold. He had been so fucking cold no matter how many blankets his siblings piled on top of him. The illness had bit into his bones and clogged his veins with ice. Despite this, anyone who touched him said he was like fire, that he was burning up like a candle wick. In a way, they had been right; Kravitz  _ had _ been like a wick. That day, he had just burned and burned and burned until he got to the end of his rope and then . . .

“Kravitz!”

He wasn’t sure who said his name, but it made him snap back from where he had been all the same. Not only were the six others gathered around all staring at him, but a few others lingering around were too. Glancing down at his hands, Kravitz realized that his form had started to melt away and the beginnings of bone were peaking up from underneath his gaunt skin. Quickly, he concentrated on his body and he could feel himself go back to normal.

“Sorry about that,” Kravitz said with a quick laugh like he had just spilled some wine instead of turning into a skeleton. “So what was the question?” Kravitz asked as if he didn’t vividly remember. “Ah yes, well I certainly didn’t get the job by handing the Raven Queen my resume, or anything.”

The others gave a polite laugh and Kravitz could tell that the subject of his how he came to be a bounty hunter would not be brought up again that night.

They moved onto safer topics. The group asked some questions about him. Kravitz asked some questions in return. He even showed off the sound effects he could do. All in all, normal party things. Merle even only asked once if Kravitz had “gotten anybody’s armed chopped off recently,” so progress was being made in his opinion.

As they made idle chatter, the party went on around them. People would come and go, some just wanting a place to sit, others seemingly wanting to see Death up close. Kravitz didn’t blame the curious though; Reapers weren’t exactly famous for making themselves known to the living without cause and when they did, well, the person in question never got the chance to pass their story along.

Until Taako, Merle and Magnus, that was. They certainly were a special case.

“So,” Merle began. “What were you and Taako up to before you-” he clapped his hands together, “poofed up here.”

Kravitz leaned back against the couch, feeling a bit more comfortable now.“Ah, well we had been in Neverwinter. Taako had-”

“Someone say my name?” Taako asked and draped himself across the arm of the couch. He had appeared so quickly, Kravitz half suspected he had Blinked over. “They playing nice, Krav? Making you feel right at home?”

Taako was pointedly looking at Magnus and Merle, not Kravitz.

Merle gave a thumbs up. “Oh yeah. Definitely.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way,” Magnus added.

Taako didn’t look too convinced, but turned back to Kravitz anyways. “So whatcha talking bout over here?”

“I was just about to tell them how you caused us to be escorted out of Fantasy Olive Garden.”

At the faux shocked look on Taako’s face, Kravitz couldn’t help but laugh. “Well I’m glad I came over here then! I had no idea you were going to slander the good name of Taako Taaco! It was not my fault we got kicked out!”

“Oh?” In an attempt to be fake-serious, Kravitz tried to hide his smile. From the look in Taako’s eyes, he wasn’t the only one. “Then who was to blame, praytell?”

Taako took a sip of his wine and swirled it around. “The waiter, obviously. Or-” he said as he gestured with his hand, “That family at booth eight. I’m telling you, if those snitches hadn’t ratted us out, ya boy Taako could have gotten ten more bowls in there easy.”

Just as Kravitz was going to say some witty retort, someone cleared their throat. “Hello?” Killian waved at the both of them. “Yes? Yeah. Sorry to interrupt and all. Um, but more importantly, how the fuck did you get kicked out of a Fantasy Olive Garden? I didn’t know they kicked  _ anybody _ out of there.”

The others nodded along in agreement, clearly curious.

Smiling, Kravitz wondered how much of the story he could get through without laughing.“You see, Taako has an unlimited pasta pass and he wanted to know-”

“Slander and lies my dude.” Taako slid from the armrest onto Kravitz’s lap. “You were curious too. Admit it.”

Holding up his hands in defeat, Kravitz conceded with a laugh. “Apologies. We  _ both  _ wanted to know exactly where the line for unlimited pasta was drawn.”

A soft, “Oh no”, could be heard, but Kravitz continued on anyways.

“And well, you all know how with the spell Rope Trick you can create an extradimensional portal?”

“ _ Oh no _ .”

Magnus, Carey and Avi were already cracking up, while Killian and Merle looked on with a sort of horror in their eyes.

That was how Kravitz ended up explaining how they had been kicked out of Fantasy Olive Garden for trying to fill a extradimensional portal with pasta, as one is ought to do. Naturally, Taako interjected occasionally, to either defend himself or pick up where Kravitz had left off when he started laughing too hard to continue.

It was . . . nice.

Was it perfect? Certainly not. Taako might have put the past behind them, but Kravitz hardly expected everyone to let bygones be bygones after a funny story about pasta and a few glasses of wine. Progress had been made though. He was sure of it. Maybe after a few more meetings, they might become acquaintances? Associates? Friends perhaps? Something. They would certainly be something. For Taako’s sake if nothing else.

By that point, the party was winding down. Most of everyone had already given their gifts and goodbyes, leaving Magnus and Merle covering up leftovers in the kitchen while he helped Taako bring the gifts to his room.

“Not gonna lie, this night didn’t go as I expected it to go,” Taako said as he began to place his presents around the room in a system of organization that Kravitz could spend centuries trying to figure out and never come close to cracking.

“Not how you expected it to go because of the surprise party or because you thought I would end up fighting your friends by the end of the night?”

Taako went silent for a moment. “Both,” he finally said. “I’m happy though- about the party and you. Birthday parties have never really been my thing. Guess you can’t really have a birthday party with just one person, huh?” Taako had gone inside his closet, putting away the clothes he had gotten. The way his voice rose and fell made it seem like everything was just peachy, but Kravitz knew from experience that Taako’s voice hid much. “I’ll have to thank Magnus and Merle later, they didn’t have to put this whole shindig on and yet they did. Not even sure how they even knew today was the day that the world was graced with my presence for the first time.”

The room went silent and Kravitz took the moment of quiet to examine the various gifts he was setting on Taako’s dresser while he tried to think of something to say. A mug, probably handmade, with the words ‘World & Moon’s Best Teacher” painted on the side. A wooden . . . Well honestly, Kravitz couldn’t tell what that one was. It was a carved animal of some kind, a weasel maybe. He’d ask Taako about that one later. The last one was a coupon book,  _ definitely  _ handmade, no doubt about that one. He was slightly tempted to flip through the book to see what ‘coupons’ it offered, but Taako interrupted that thought.

“Do you wanna stay the night?”

Kravitz fumbled with the coupon book and whipped around. He hadn’t heard him step out of the closet and now that he could see him, Kravitz saw how Taako’s leg slightly bounced up and down and his eyes were glancing around the room. “Come again?”

Taako mumbled something and then cleared his throat, finally looking right at him. “Wanna stay the night? I mean, I don’t know if you sleep or anything, but my bed’s big enough if you do. Defo should warn you now though: Night Terrors, I get those sometimes. So there is a chance I could kick you and if that’s not something you wanna deal with, completely understand. I also got clothes you can borrow if your not into chillaxing in a three piece suit.”

In retrospect, Kravitz probably should have waited a few seconds before blurting out “of course” as to not seem desperate. In that moment though, the words ‘sauve’ or ‘nonchalant’ had not been apart of Kravitz’s vocabulary. However, by the smile that greeted him, Taako didn’t seem to care about whether Kravitz was sauve or nonchalant. He was simply happy he was there with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading chapter three! Again, I hope everyone enjoyed it! Fun fact of the day: This chapter was originally written from Taako's pov and included a scene Angus giving him the mug. However, about half way through I realized that it would be way more fun to write Kravitz trying to navigate his way through the party and I'm really happy with how it turned out!


	4. Confessions

“Looking good, hot stuff.”

Taako was sitting on the bed when Kravitz stepped out from the small bathroom. Quite honestly, he wasn’t sure how truthful Taako’s statement was though. Kravitz had been given a baggy shirt to wear to bed, the words ‘I Switched Bodies With My Coworker And All I Got Was This Lousy Shirt’ emblazoned on the front. Was it the first thing someone would think of when supplied with the words appealing or handsome? Kravitz was going to have to give that one a no. In fact, the first thing it really brought to mind was that Taako was far taller than Kravitz. Was he going to complain though? Absolutely not. One, it smelled vaguely of Taako and two, the elf in question was looking at him like he was stunning. That was good enough for him.

“Thank you again for letting me borrow this,” Kravitz said as he walked over, not sure how to reply to the complement.

Clicking his tongue twice and holding his fingers out like fantasy guns, Taako smiled and said, “no problemo,” before falling back to sprawl out on the covers. “So do you sleep? You never answered before.”

Kravitz sat down next to Taako, smiling contently at the way his hair fanned out around him. “Sometimes. I don’t have to, but it is nice now and again.”

“Good to know.”

“What about you?” Kravitz asked as he too laid down. “I thought elves meditated instead of sleeping?”

Taako shrugged, or at least, shrugged as well as someone could while lying down. “We’re a mysterious bunch.” Kravitz assumed that was the only answer he was going to get, but Taako continued on. “Sleeping is  _ way _ better than sitting around, doing mental exercises and shit.” He paused and then finally added, “Also I meditate with my eyes open and let me tell ya, that’s not a good look. Trust me”

All Kravitz could think to say was “huh,” as he imagined what it would be like to wake up with Taako apparently staring at him, unmoving. It would take some getting used to, but in all honesty, the idea of just waking up with Taako at all was a fantastic thought on its own.

“Enough talk of sleeping,” Taako said. “Let's get this show on the road if you’re all set.”

With that, the two of them climbed under the covers and Kravitz was left laying a good foot away from Taako, arms above the covers and staring at the ceiling realizing they never set any boundaries for their sleeping arrangement. Not a single one. Was cuddling acceptable? He wasn’t sure. Kravitz desperately wanted to hold Taako in his arms or be held in Taako’s arms as they drifted off to sleep. What about Taako though? He had mentioned the possibility of kicking, so maybe he wanted to keep some distance between the two of them.

Glancing over in the darkness, Kravitz saw that Taako was in a similar position, arms lying above the covers, staring up into space. As if he could feel Kravitz’s eyes on him, Taako suddenly peered over and they spent a good few seconds looking at each other.

The silence continued for a moment or two before they both burst out laughing, the tension leaving them with each breath. Kravitz could only imagine that similar questions had been racing through Taako’s head as well. It was comforting in a way that neither of them really seemed to know what they were doing.

“Having fun over there?” Taako whispered, cupping his hands around his mouth as if he was yelling across a chasm.

Bringing up his own hands to his face, Kravitz whispered back. “Oh absolutely. And you?”

Taako tapped his chin, deep in thought. “Could be better,” he finally called back. “Rather lonely and all.”

That was all Kravitz needed to scoot over in the bed so that he could feel the heat radiating from Taako’s skin. “How about now?”

Suddenly, he felt Taako’s arms wrap themselves around him and their legs tangled together. “Much better,” Taako confirmed. “Your feet are like, twenty degrees colder than the rest of you though. Didn’t even think that was possible,” he teased.

For a split second, Kravitz was sorely tempted to press his feet closer to Taako if only to elicit a reaction. In the end, he decided that no, maybe that wasn’t the best idea and instead ran his hand through Taako’s hair. “Should I invest in socks for next time?”

Taako pondered that for a moment as he walked his fingers down Kravitz’s back. “Hmm. You might be onto something there, my dude.”

Neither mentioned the unspoken agreement that yes, there would be a next time.

“So, hey um,” Taako started, his voice low and quiet. “Magnus mentioned that you went all, spooky skeleton during the party. Are you alright?”

Ah. Yes.  _ That _ . “I had just been thinking of things. Things that I try not to dwell on seeing as I can never change them. I don’t want you to worry though, I’m okay now,” he reassured. “Really.”

In the darkness, Taako looked hesitant. However, instead of pressing him for details, Taako simply pressed closer to him. “As long as you’re good. Just remember, got two ears here. I’ll always lend you one if you need it.”

Curling closer to him, Kravitz smiled. He would definitely take Taako up on that offer. Not that night though. No. He was content to lay there and bask in Taako’s warmth, leaving talks of death for another day.

Laying there, face to face, Kravitz had never been so glad he could see in the dark. The way that Taako’s mouth curled up in a smile, the locks of hair framing his face, the freckles dusted across his nose and cheeks, Kravitz wouldn’t want to miss them for a second.

“I love you,” Kravitz suddenly confessed, letting loose a thought he had cooped up in his head for some time, but had yet to express. Oh fuck. He hadn’t meant to say that. Well he had. At some point. But Kravitz sure as fuck had not been planning to say it right then. It had slipped out, like a soul from the eternal stockade. Unlike a soul though, there was no shoving his words back in and pretending they had never escaped in the first place. They were out and that was that.

“Cool,” Taako replied, his voice cracking.

They both laid there, frozen. Neither of them looked away from the other. Cool? What did cool mean? That was bad, right? Taako had a look of what Kravitz could only describe as dawning horror on his face. For his part, Kravitz had no idea what his own face looked like in that moment. He just hoped it could be described using words such as ‘human’ or ‘definitely not a skeleton’ maybe even ‘oh boy that guy sure does have flesh’.

“I . . .” Taako started to say, but stopped. “Um, look Kravitz . . .”

Oh gods, Taako probably felt pressured to say it back now. Or maybe he was trying to think of some way to let Kravitz down gently. Somehow, his own brain had picked the absolute worst time to say  _ it _ in all of existence. Taking a deep breath, Kravitz gave Taako a weak smile. “I understand completely if you don’t feel the same way or don’t want to say it, I shouldn’t have-”

“No no no no!” Taako suddenly scrambled upright, lighting the room with magic as he did. “Don’t think for a second that I don’t . . . Look, I just wasn’t thinking and-” He rubbed his hands over his face and screwed his eyes shut. “Can you say it again?” he mumbled. “If you know, you haven’t changed your mind cause I’m an idiot wizard and all.”

There had many times in Kravitz’s life where he had hesitated. When he accepted the Raven Queen’s offer to be a bounty hunter, he had hesitated. When he wiped clean the bounties of Merle, Magnus and Taako, he had hesitated. However, in that moment, there was not a trace of hesitation when he once again said, “Taako, I love you.”

“I love you too,” Taako said so fast it was like words were spilling out of him. “I love your laugh and I love your sound effects and accents you do and how you can fight dragons made of light but are stumped at making a vase? That’s the fucking best. I love how you would stay for a party where you know jackshit about anybody there just for me and I love how when your passionate as balls about something, you look like your conducting cause of how you talk with your hands. I don’t even know if you knew you do that one, but you do and I love it. Finally, I love how you would tell me again that you love me because I’m an absolute buffoon who said cool the first time. Like who does that? This fool apparently who was half worried you would disintegrate when I said I love you.”

Kravitz was stunned for a second. Just for a second though. With only a quick moment to ensure that yes, he had skin and lips and other things people generally looked for when kissing someone, he leaned in and placed one hand on the back of Taako’s neck while the other ran through his hair. Taako, with a relieved smile on his face, leaned in as well.

It wasn’t their first kiss by a long shot. No, they had kissed in parks and restaurants, museums and concert halls, all places that most would consider far more romantic than a cluttered bedroom. However, sitting there on Taako’s bed in a borrowed baggy shirt, illuminated by the soft haze of magic, feeling hands gently tug on his hair as Taako’s lips pressed against his own with a heat which spread through his body like slipping into a warm bath, Kravitz would say that this was, by far, their best kiss.

As they separated for a brief minute, Taako lightly chuckled as he looked into Kravitz’s eyes. “We certainly are something, huh?”

Kravitz smiled. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Later, wrapped in each other’s arms and the comfort of being loved, Kravitz and Taako were just about to drift off to sleep when Kravitz pressed his lips to shell of Taako’s ear. “Oh and Taako?”

“Mhmm?” he mumbled.

“Happy birthday.”

As he lay there, cuddled up against Taako, Kravitz could have pondered how the moon base was never truly quiet. He could have thought about how the vents carried along the sounds of murmuring in the next room over, the gentle humming of whatever kept the base afloat, the rush of the wind blowing against the side of the moon as it swept across the sky and a million other sounds which all came together to form something that was unique to the Bureau of Balance.

Kravitz didn’t think about any of that though.

The only sound that had fully captured his attention was the deep rise and fall of Taako’s breaths as he fell asleep in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank you all for reading this! All the reactions I've gotten for this work have been truly amazing and it was always so wonderful to wake up to a new comment or kudos. I've already got some ideas for other fics involving these two dorks in love and I'm excited to share them all with you (once I actually write them).


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